A Town Hall discussion on this draft policy will be held on Sunday, January 7, 2024, at 9 AM ET
Please leave your comments on this draft in the comments section below. To reduce spam, comments may take 8-12 hours to be posted.
Background
On a regular basis, questions arise to the Service Team about what images and names on Zoom (Name, Thumbnail/Avatar, Background Image) are appropriate for the Trusted Servants and for the whole fellowship, and often these questions reference Tradition 10, that Adult Children of Alcoholics has no opinion on outside issues; hence the ACA name should never be drawn into public controversy.
The purpose of this Town Hall discussion meeting is to review the draft Names & Images policy intended to address this issue and to gather the comments and questions of our full fellowship. The policy will then be edited and updated by the SWG in preparation for vote on its final form in an upcoming Group Conscience meeting, to be held within a few weeks of this town hall meeting, after any edits are made.
Town Hall Discussion Approach
In our Town Hall Discussion, we will:
- Read the draft Images & Names Policy,
- Open the floor for comments and questions of the fellowship (including reading those posted on the website), and
- Take all input and ideas back to the SWG for finalization of the Names & Images Policy, posting again on the website for review in advance of the Group Conscience vote.
We look forward to seeing you there!
Your SWG Team (Lisa, Jim, Chris, Wendy, Vivienne, Boaz, Rene)
I think that this draft policy is great. Thank you for putting it together and for the town hall meeting to discuss it.
Hey, what do you think of my new name? Hope you’re not triggered. If so, I guess that just points out where you may need to be doing a little more recovery work. And, yes, I suppose my name could be extra disarming since I use it while being of service, but really, even if this is your first ACA meeting, you should somehow know that while I may facilitate a Breakout Room, I don’t represent the meeting… right?
Anyway, you’ll get used to the name. And, if you ask me to change it, I’ll say, “You have no right”, since there is no written policy in place. No one’s the boss of me. I am a member of this meeting and can do what I want. Hey, I’ve been looking for the right picture to use… I’m thinking red, white and bluish… maybe some stars. Perhaps you could help me choose.
The level of emotional defiance within this “Up in Arms . . .” comment saddens me.
I also think it’s telling that this individual has chosen to remain anonymous.
On the issue of whether these social issues have anything to do with ACA recovery, these were lively and sometimes violent issues in my childhood. My father was a white supremist. It was dreadful
Boundaries are gentler than rule and scripts are gentler than policy. Policies and rules involves policing of rules and policies, putting the burden of authority figure on trusted servants. This can lead to conflict in a meeting.
I would much rather a something in the script that addresses these issues which can be a gentle statement of boundaries. For Example, “We ask that profile pictures and backgrounds not contain political slogans, …….”
Thanks to all the work done to bring this issue to the group.
I believe this policy is essentially unworkable.
I agree with the SMR meeting “safety statement” that “safety is a responsibility we all share.”
I agree with the “Purpose:” statement, and believe this may be a good guiding principle for this “policy”. I also think that with the traditions this may be sufficient.
I think the the statement that starts “Policy:” is really a “purpose” statement as well. A policy is a statement that can be used for making future decisions. I would state it more like “Policy: Co-creation of a gentle and respectful space where safety is a shared responsibility” and then use 12 step methods to discern, such as individual reflection on feedback and group conscience, if necessary, to resolve ongoing disagreements.
The section labled “Process:” is not a process. A process would be a series of questions with answers on what to say or do depending upon the answer to the question. I believe the only “process;” in 12 steps is following the traditions and the steps. Individual exploration, aka step 4 or step 10, exploration with fellow travelers or a sponsor, and then using group conscience when discernment indicates it is a good next step.
I don’t believe trusted servants can render subjective decisions without creating controversy and risk their personal serenity and recovery, possibly even recreating and acting out traits from their family of origin, in service and acting on a policy that is as vague as this one.
For example the “policy” doesnt say what to do if a servant determines a symbol is “nationalist” or “religous”. it also is impossible to define what all symbols may be interepreted in these ways, for example is a chalice, or a lit candle a religous symbol? Is the word “patriot” a national symbol?
In general I recommend that 12 step work remain that, and that when someone is “triggered” by something they see or experience that they be encouraged to work the 12 steps with a fellow traveler or sponsor or at a meeting, or to call a group conscious and work it in there in harmony with the principles of the program, ever reminding us to put principles before personalities and that there is but one authority, a loving higher power who may express itself through the group conscious.
So that being said I propose the alternative below to the document provided on this website:
Policy Title: Name and Image Guidance for Trusted Servants and Members of SMR Zoom Meeting
Purpose: To support ongoing recovery and create a respectful and welcoming environment for newcomers and all members
Suggestions: We encourage the use of neutral images, such as self portraits and first names, in zoom identification during meeting attendance.
If someone experiences a name or image that evokes strong feelings they are encouraged to use the principles of the program to discern the next right action for them: working it from the inside out with themselves, a fellow traveler or sponsor, and if necessary by calling for a group conscience.
Policy: Trusted servants will censor rude or offensive images or words such as sexually explicit images or curse words (in any language they recognize) and defer to the group consciousness on all other names or images that a member may bring to their attention as possibly worthy of censorship.
Thanks for letting me share. I now turn this over to my own loving higher power.
Thank you for your service.
Well written! Sounds good!
I believe all images and names should be neutral. I believe in following the 12 traditions and keeping the meeting safe from outside issues.
Appreciate this application of Tradition(s)
this is so beautiful. all are welcome, and these solutions, will allow those of us doing this work- to not be triggered. a.a. and al anon people without a practice- may not come here and bully the ACA (and d). people with outside affiliations? enjoy em. outside of this HEALING SPACE. thank you service team for allowing me to come here. we (my inner infant, child, teen and lost self) don’t wanna die, anymore.
I like it. I think it’s simple and direct but not prescriptive. Perhaps we Could add to (b.) First name and last initial or a name that represents you today. Geographical region if you like, but this is only a suggestion. Pronouns if you are comfortable sharing but again, only a suggestion. I like the Avatar suggestions. Again, very clear and simple. And I won’t have to look at any more Yankees backgrounds ( 🙂 Just Kidding 🙂 ). I am a lover of simple policies and to me this policy is simple, clear but not prescriptive. Thank you!
The guidelines we are seeking as a community is to Balance Self-expression/ Identity
Vs bringing in Polarizing outside issues. …
We need also a Balance between Rigidity vs Self-expression.
ie specifying exactly how we should Name ourselves. The Example given–of first name; plus geography is fine. But maybe too confining . A nickname; or other expression
of Identity (“Llama Lady”; “Music Man” “Sunflower” “Cat Lover’ “Wild Child”) can be A-political also
Can we have Positive Guidelines for choosing our names and avatoars?
EG: We are ALL ACA’s. In choosing our names and avators, maybe we should encourage members, offer suggestions, to give Voice and Expression to our deepest Inner Child.
Like a childhood photo; or picture that shows who/ what we love now, inspiring vistas of natural beauty or works of Art .
Each morning there are Hundreds of Good Examples; that can serve as Role Models. There are also many many blank black screens (like mine) of people (like me) who are both uncertain of HOW to create a Background screen, and Uncertain of which picture to choose. (Am I ready to show my Inner child? How much of myself am I willing to express?)
I Do enjoy the avatars/backgrounds of others. It also helps me Identify the speaker; creating a continuity and relationship with them.
May I suggest some Inner Child Workshops to help and encourage members to develop and post their Avators?
And as we express ourselves, our inner children, we need also bear in mind—
“Not everybody’s gonna like me. Not everybody’s gonna treat me Fair”
We are free to have our own likes and dislikes; but need to respect the rights of others to be who they are; and express themselves, as long as it does not bring in a POLARIZING outside politcal or religious issue.