Proposed by various SMR meeting members, as noted below
Three proposals on the subject of the SMR after-meeting were received recently. We are listing all three here to give a broad perspective of the issues. While not a typical means for addressing proposals, it seems that for clarity and focus, we could offer the proposals here, together, and begin hearing comments.
Two of the proposals focus on concluding the after-meeting in order to make space for an SMR business meeting. The third proposal expands that focus to include exploring creative solutions to other challenging aspects of the after-meeting experience.
The comment phase of our process lasts for three weeks. It is likely that the comments will lead us to our next steps which could include mention of the issue at the July business meeting; scheduling a Town Hall style group discussion; a clearer proposal; or even a drafted set of guidelines for the after-meeting to be brought before the group for adoption. The choice belongs to us all.
Our hope is greater clarity on how the entire fellowship views these issues. Your comments are important.
NOTE: At the SMR Business meeting of June 14th, this motion was passed:
MOTION: Suzanne B. (2nd Stephen in Harlem) to create an SMR subcommittee (actually an Ad hoc committee) to discuss the after-meeting challenges in greater detail – Passed unopposed.
The choice as to who would chair or convene this committee was never addressed. The space is open for a committee of all interested SMR members to form.
Proposed by Jim R – June 17, 2025
Issue A: I move that clear, concise ending times be established, daily, for the SMR after-meeting, at or before 12 noon eastern standard time.
Background: On multiple occasions the Thursday 2pm Website working group has logged-on to find a few remaining after-meeting participants, talking and sharing. Unfortunately these encounters have generated accusations and resentments resulting in hurt feelings.
Zoom Workplace technology allows SMR to easily set time limits by scheduling meetings. This is a practice we once employed and can return to. We are asking the group to determine an appropriate time for the SMR after-meeting to close.
Proposed by Suzanne B – June 18, 2025
Issue B: I move that now would be a good time to look at the variety of issues surrounding the after-meeting, as set out here:
| 1 | Move to set a fixed daily end-time for the after-meeting session. | A clear cutoff prevents open-ended conversation and encourages timely negotiation toward closure. |
| 2 | Move that after-meeting hosts be SMR-trained, appear on camera at least 50 % of the time, use timed shares, and close the gathering. | Aligning host practice with SMR norms builds safety, trust, and procedural consistency between the two meetings. |
| 3 | Move to reinstate and enforce the no-crosstalk rule, apply a timer to each share, and redirect extended dialogues to private follow-ups. | Structured sharing protects boundaries, reduces conflict, and maintains group unity and focus. |
| 4 | Move to pilot a subcommittee-led observation of the after-meeting for a defined period (e.g., one month) to assess its health. | A time-bound trial yields real-world data before permanent adoption of changes. |
| 5 | Move to adopt WSO guidelines as the baseline framework for boundaries and safety in the after-meeting. | Established fellowship standards embed proven best practices for healthy group conduct. |
| 6 | Move to introduce a brief opening and closing script that affirms confidentiality, safety, and unity. | Repeating core principles at start and end sets expectations and reminds members of shared values. |
| 7 | Move that all hosts and co-hosts review and understand the ACA Community Safety Guidelines before serving. | Informed facilitators can model and uphold safe conduct for the group. |
| 8 | Move to schedule solution-focused discussions on topics such as healthy relationships and healthy group practices. | Guided topics channel energy toward recovery skills instead of conflict or crosstalk. |
| 9 | Move to keep the after-meeting open to all ACA members while maintaining time limits, scripts, host accountability, no-crosstalk, confidentiality, and a clear end time. | Inclusive structure prevents cliques, ensures fairness, and lets everyone know the boundaries. |
| 10 | Move to provide breakout rooms during the meeting for members who wish to practise conversational skills. | Parallel spaces allow deeper connection without disrupting the main group’s focus. |
| 11 | Move that all participants honour ACA safety guidelines and respect the SMR calendar of events. | Consistent adherence to agreed standards safeguards harmony and respects scheduled programming. |
Background: In my experience, having a bit of structure in our meetings can really support everyone’s voice being heard and help prevent any one perspective from unintentionally dominating. This kind of balance makes it easier for us to heal and grow together.
I believe that by collaborating intentionally, we can uncover creative and unifying solutions. With shared input, we can shape simple, helpful guidelines that serve our collective goals.
These are just some personal reflections I wanted to offer. I believe addressing these points can help us create a healthier, more effective meeting space for all.
Also, I have taken part in meetings that would do annual group inventories where a committee would survey and report on the health of the meeting.
Proposed by Sue of the Swamp – June 19, 2025
Issue C: I make a motion that the members of the SMR after-meeting be responsible for checking the zoom meeting room schedule and clearing the zoom room at least 15 minutes before other scheduled meetings are due to arrive.
Background: The SMR aftermeeting is a close knit, supportive community of ACA members who hang out together online after the end of the SMR meeting and Newcomer Question Session. Not unlike an AA clubhouse, members often hang around for hours enjoying the companionship and support of our fellows. All members of the ACA community are welcomed there.
This often lengthy meeting is sometimes still in the zoom room when other SMR related groups show up for their meeting. The members that attend the aftermeeting realize that this can be problematic.
As a solution, we propose that members of the aftermeeting be responsible for checking the zoom room schedule published on the ACAmorning.org website and that they clear the zoom room for scheduled incoming meetings at least 15 minutes ahead of that meeting’s start.
This aftermeeting zoom space is very important to those who participate. It is moderated by the attending members, has boundaries in place regarding cross talk, and while we don’t have timed shares, members are reminded to be respectful of others regarding the amount of time they speak. In this meeting members speak honestly and openly about the issues that are distressing them and are listened to with compassion and respect.
Most importantly, the after meeting provides connection and support for vulnerable members of our fellowship, allowing them to develop the safe relationships that make recovery possible.
When voting or commenting on this proposal, please keep in mind that this proposal solely addresses the cooperative use of the zoom room space. We hope that this proposal sufficiently addresses the concerns arising from the difficulties that can arise when multiple groups share a zoom room meeting space and that this proposal will be accepted.
The opportunity to comment and reply will be open for 3 weeks, until Thursday, July 17th.
Hi
I disagree with changing the SMR after meeting
I do not see or hear any problems in the after meeting
It id so helpful to have it open to all and to any topic
The actual SMR meeting itself is already structured
I think it’s ok to leave the after meeting as it is
What is proposed is so over the top in my opinion ….. thank you
Or simply say, I just needed to be heard. So thank you, my share is not open for feedback.
For me, I would feel more comfortable having more clarity on the after meeting script, so it can remain a safe space and respectful.
For example: Everyone is welcome to ask questions (giving priority to newcomers to the meeting) or share and afterwards precise/voice the kind of feedback/help they are seeking.
Am I seeking a reflection or paraphrasing of what I just shared? Or am I seeking to hear and be inspired by other members similar experiences, strength & hope?
In this way crosstalk guidelines can remain intact.
After spending considerable time contemplating this issue, I believe strongly that the after meeting should conclude at the time appropriate and decided by those who are in attendance of that space. The depth and profound healing that I have witnessed in the sacred space known as the after meeting is beyond description: I question why anyone would want to curtail and control recovery in process? As I understand it, control is a trait and not a principle. Given the advent of the technology of Zoom where multiple meeting rooms and spaces can be accommodated simultaneously, I see no reason to “control” the Divinely guided recovery process amongst those who attend. I am also struck by the fact that the motions to control via time limit have been primarily promoted by those who do not attend the space…that is concerning to me again because controlling others is a trait and not a principle. I therefore support a respectful co-existence of multiple meeting rooms if needed by utilizing breakout rooms.
I hope that this space is left open as long as it is possible to …. The after meeting has been so nurturing and loving
I’m new to this room and these past three days it’s the after meeting that have helped me to deal with many personal issues
I felt the freedom to share intimate issues that I would not have been able to share in a larger setting . I’ve been welcomed and supported while going through very difficult times. It is a safe and welcoming space and I’m so grateful for having found it and have been embraced by everyone!!
I agree strongly with the proposal put forth by Sue of the Swamp!
It is very important that those in the after-meeting not add extra stress or challenges on leaders for the S.M.R. meeting. I was facilitating the after-meeting that Thursday when the conversation was still going when the website team entered to undertake their duties. Because of the extremely delicate and vulnerable conversation of healing that was taking place at the time, a request was made for a break-out room.
Thinking deeply about the experience since then, I feel it is extremely important that all who provide leadership for S.M.R. (including the website team) be treated with the utmost respect! Realistically, the after-meeting only happens in the first place because of the organizational skills and personal sacrifices of time and energy of those who provide leadership for S.M.R.
As one who often stays in the after-meeting until its end, I have personally benefitted from the great healing that occurs in that space. Conversely, I recognize that many people might not be inclined to stay on the after-meeting, nor even understand why anyone might want to do so. Honestly, though, any person who doesn’t benefit from the after-meeting has the freedom to hit the “leave meeting” button at any time and go about their day.
Having been present that particular Thursday when the conflict occurred, I doubt the deep healing achieved would have happened if the after-meeting had been arbitrarily cut off at noon.
In my opinion, a big part of the beauty of the after-meeting is its organic nature, in that topics shift based on who is present and sharing at the time. To attempt to dictate what topics are allowable would significantly detract from the power of the space, I believe.
I have been struck by the fact that there is no section on our website devoted to the after-meeting. Having a space where the agreed upon guidelines and customary practices are written out and available as reference would be really helpful.
I look forward to reading what members ideas are around the after-meeting.
Personally, I believe there is great healing that occurs in the space.
Oh, and I love the idea of having, as a standard practice, 3 or 4 breakout rooms created daily for members to move in and out of freely – a time out space, a separate chat, a private discussion – very empowering for the group.
I support setting an end time for the after-meeting. (Say 2 hours)
I agree with the hosts having training.
I think the ability to give feedback is highly beneficial and should continue as long as it is preceded by confirmation from the original sharer that they are seeking feedback.
I’m torn on timing. I have experienced the lack of timer being abused, but also recognize the after-meeting is a place for those who need to share more.
I agree with an end time for the after meeting and that there be an ongoing communication about having safety standards for the after meeting.